So, life presents another perfect trifector...returning from a trip that I couldn't afford to begin with, finding that my house sitter was running a crack house or a whore house or a crack whore house and accidentally locking myself out of my blog....which to address first?
Restoring the house to a state of order took practically an entire month. In the old days, when I could clean the house thoroughly in a day or a weekend it still may have taken me a week but as it is, I no longer even attempt such an activity level...in the end, aside from the disappearance of this, that and the other thing, I just consider it another one of life's little challenges.
In the meantime, as you can plainly see, I have re-accessed my blog so I guess you could say that things are back to a more normal situation...and you now have my renewed commitment to post on more usual basis.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Speechless
For my birthday this year, I went to meet and visit with Vivian Marian. It is not often that I am rendered speechless, but every time I try to talk about this amazing experience and what it means to me, I find myself unable to make complete sentences or am reduced to total mush so I will set this aside for another time. It is too precious to address poorly
Monday, April 30, 2012
Emotional Anchors
I am writing you tonight from Fallon, NV. Home of the most amazing events. I seriously do not know where to begin, except at the beginning-of course, that is much too linear.
I had the most interesting insight yesterday. It occurred to me that it took me more than twenty years to figure out that I had the most extraordinary life. As I walked through it, it seemed like just another day of challenges with more success than failure, and a willingness to look at my mistakes from the inside, just to avoid repeating them/ This kept me very busy and I did not think this extraordinay either...what if, what if my life at this exact moment is also extraordinary? I don't know anyone else that has experienced anything like my personal experiences-breathtaking or devastating, my story seems unbelievable to some-sometimes. even to me.
I know a couple of people specifically that believe me to be a whale-of-a-tale teller, to be polite. It's okay, I've learned that whether or not someone believes me doesn't change the truth of it, it just means that my life is just that unbelievable. If they can't believe it even possible, how would they respond if they actually lived it, like I do?
This trip began with an unusually high level of anxiety, which isn't really surprising given last year's traumas. Now that I've met sweet Vivian and visited with these dear ones, I want to go home and for the first time-that craving is Colorado. So, I guess I have adjusted to my new home. It feels good to know that...for sometime now, I have felt adrift.
Never before in my life have I lived somewhere without others, loved ones to anchor me to a place and time. My first semester of college is a close second, though I was fortunate to make a friend my first night in the dorm. Constructing my life from whole cloth was and is, quite the challenge. At this moment, I understand that my emotional anchors have a much longer and stronger chain than I realized. That may not provide any solutions in and of itself, but it is good to know that I am not as untethered as I felt, and it is even better to know that as I get more familiar with adaptations to building a life that I can be proud of, the home team is rooting for me.
I had the most interesting insight yesterday. It occurred to me that it took me more than twenty years to figure out that I had the most extraordinary life. As I walked through it, it seemed like just another day of challenges with more success than failure, and a willingness to look at my mistakes from the inside, just to avoid repeating them/ This kept me very busy and I did not think this extraordinay either...what if, what if my life at this exact moment is also extraordinary? I don't know anyone else that has experienced anything like my personal experiences-breathtaking or devastating, my story seems unbelievable to some-sometimes. even to me.
I know a couple of people specifically that believe me to be a whale-of-a-tale teller, to be polite. It's okay, I've learned that whether or not someone believes me doesn't change the truth of it, it just means that my life is just that unbelievable. If they can't believe it even possible, how would they respond if they actually lived it, like I do?
This trip began with an unusually high level of anxiety, which isn't really surprising given last year's traumas. Now that I've met sweet Vivian and visited with these dear ones, I want to go home and for the first time-that craving is Colorado. So, I guess I have adjusted to my new home. It feels good to know that...for sometime now, I have felt adrift.
Never before in my life have I lived somewhere without others, loved ones to anchor me to a place and time. My first semester of college is a close second, though I was fortunate to make a friend my first night in the dorm. Constructing my life from whole cloth was and is, quite the challenge. At this moment, I understand that my emotional anchors have a much longer and stronger chain than I realized. That may not provide any solutions in and of itself, but it is good to know that I am not as untethered as I felt, and it is even better to know that as I get more familiar with adaptations to building a life that I can be proud of, the home team is rooting for me.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Sometimes I Wonder...
Sometimes I wonder about strange things...
then I wonder if other people wonder about them too,
but just don't talk about it...
then I think, maybe those conversations would be more interesting...
than what's on the news...
than politics...
than what stupid stars are doing...
Sometimes I wonder about strange things...
like how many friends you've made this year...
like what the most beautiful thing you've ever seen is...
like what food makes you drool just by thinking about it...
like which moment in life do you recall most often...
I would like to have these conversations
then I wonder if other people wonder about them too,
but just don't talk about it...
then I think, maybe those conversations would be more interesting...
than what's on the news...
than politics...
than what stupid stars are doing...
Sometimes I wonder about strange things...
like how many friends you've made this year...
like what the most beautiful thing you've ever seen is...
like what food makes you drool just by thinking about it...
like which moment in life do you recall most often...
I would like to have these conversations
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Infrequent Flyer
Okay you die hards, I'm posting just for you...Once again life has gotten away from me, and I mean that in the nicest possible way.
If anyone would have told me that I'd have ten tax documents to prepare this year I wouldn't have believed them, but alas, I am not even exaggerating. I've spent the last three days just reading instructions and trying to determine where to begin. Tonight, I have that answer and so I can go to sleep at least feeling like I accomplished something. Not that I've completed even the shortest of these forms, just that I have an idea of what it is that I need to do, and how the forms flow one into the other. A paperless society indeed.
You can expect that I will not be posting until I have completed my taxes, April 15th for you non-Americans. It may be that I have come to the end of this blog, unless someone tells me that they give a crap that I continue writing it.
I have other writing projects roaming around my mind and it may be that since I am no longer posting regularly, and my family and friends now can contact me at a residential address that it is time to let this go. Who knows, I may need to blow off some steam mid-filing just to deal with words instead of numbers, but I doubt it.
My email address is goodhobbits@comcast.net if you feel the need to contact me, just to be sure that I haven't left the planet, never fear, I keep my towel handy. {If you don't recognise that referent, read The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy and get back to me.} You grok? [If you don't get that referent, read Stranger in a Strange Land] that ought to keep you busy until I get back.
If anyone would have told me that I'd have ten tax documents to prepare this year I wouldn't have believed them, but alas, I am not even exaggerating. I've spent the last three days just reading instructions and trying to determine where to begin. Tonight, I have that answer and so I can go to sleep at least feeling like I accomplished something. Not that I've completed even the shortest of these forms, just that I have an idea of what it is that I need to do, and how the forms flow one into the other. A paperless society indeed.
You can expect that I will not be posting until I have completed my taxes, April 15th for you non-Americans. It may be that I have come to the end of this blog, unless someone tells me that they give a crap that I continue writing it.
I have other writing projects roaming around my mind and it may be that since I am no longer posting regularly, and my family and friends now can contact me at a residential address that it is time to let this go. Who knows, I may need to blow off some steam mid-filing just to deal with words instead of numbers, but I doubt it.
My email address is goodhobbits@comcast.net if you feel the need to contact me, just to be sure that I haven't left the planet, never fear, I keep my towel handy. {If you don't recognise that referent, read The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy and get back to me.} You grok? [If you don't get that referent, read Stranger in a Strange Land] that ought to keep you busy until I get back.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
How To Feel Rich and Fit
The struggles of these last few years have taken their toll on me, and if you don't know what struggles I'm talking about...well, then I guess you don't need to. Anyway, I am not beyond feeling sorry for myself even if I do try to avoid it.
Recently, I have started giving an old woman a ride to church on Sundays. I have no idea how old she is, but she looks a lot like a candy cane without the striping. When she comes out of her apartment, she has her cane and she steadies herself on my arm. It feels really good to be someone you can lean on. Even if I am wearing bedroom slippers because I can't get my shoes on, I feel healthy and fit.
Recently, I have started working with the Springs Rescue Mission, and by working with I mean making a few phone calls from the comfort of my living room. I went by the other day to see how many or if any volunteers showed up. I was pleased to see four guys working, and it made me happy to know that the little bit I can do is worthwhile.
I've been thinking a lot about the women and their children that will be living there, and you know, I am truly blessed. It really depends on where you look for confirmation but I can tell you that I am fit and quite wealthy at the moment.
Recently, I have started giving an old woman a ride to church on Sundays. I have no idea how old she is, but she looks a lot like a candy cane without the striping. When she comes out of her apartment, she has her cane and she steadies herself on my arm. It feels really good to be someone you can lean on. Even if I am wearing bedroom slippers because I can't get my shoes on, I feel healthy and fit.
Recently, I have started working with the Springs Rescue Mission, and by working with I mean making a few phone calls from the comfort of my living room. I went by the other day to see how many or if any volunteers showed up. I was pleased to see four guys working, and it made me happy to know that the little bit I can do is worthwhile.
I've been thinking a lot about the women and their children that will be living there, and you know, I am truly blessed. It really depends on where you look for confirmation but I can tell you that I am fit and quite wealthy at the moment.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
A Fantasy Becomes Reality
Somewhere in my early twenties while walking passed a closed down motel I wished that they would turn that motel and all the vacant buildings into a home for the lost among us. This week I have seen that idea turned into reality.
The Springs Rescue Mission has taken over a motel and is in the process of turning it into a home for women and children. The program takes homeless families and gives them a room in this motel, equipped with all their needs. The mothers and the children recieve educational support, as well as meeting all of their physical needs set up in a way that allows them not only to break the cycle of homelessness, but poverty as well.
As it happens, I was asked to make some phone calls looking for volunteers in the conversion of the building. Using the phone book, I called churches in the area looking for skilled labor, plumbers, carpenters and the like to assist the master electrician that is currently completing his phase of the project.
Every person that I spoke with was receptive to me and even though no one knew of anyone who was available to work, people started showing up. It is my hope and prayer that they get all of the workers that they need to finish the project on time.
To fund the project, they are asking that a church, group or individual adopt one room. The cost of furnishing one apartment for a family of five is $3,000.00. Smaller families require less furniture and what all so that is the highest sponsorship. Certainly, others are donating smaller amounts for consumables like diapers and the like. When the family completes the program they get to keep all of the furniture and everything as well as assistance finding a place and staying on their feet. It is very exciting to play even this small part in such an exciting project.
The Springs Rescue Mission has taken over a motel and is in the process of turning it into a home for women and children. The program takes homeless families and gives them a room in this motel, equipped with all their needs. The mothers and the children recieve educational support, as well as meeting all of their physical needs set up in a way that allows them not only to break the cycle of homelessness, but poverty as well.
As it happens, I was asked to make some phone calls looking for volunteers in the conversion of the building. Using the phone book, I called churches in the area looking for skilled labor, plumbers, carpenters and the like to assist the master electrician that is currently completing his phase of the project.
Every person that I spoke with was receptive to me and even though no one knew of anyone who was available to work, people started showing up. It is my hope and prayer that they get all of the workers that they need to finish the project on time.
To fund the project, they are asking that a church, group or individual adopt one room. The cost of furnishing one apartment for a family of five is $3,000.00. Smaller families require less furniture and what all so that is the highest sponsorship. Certainly, others are donating smaller amounts for consumables like diapers and the like. When the family completes the program they get to keep all of the furniture and everything as well as assistance finding a place and staying on their feet. It is very exciting to play even this small part in such an exciting project.
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